Sunday, September 04, 2005

A Tribute to Sewer Guys

Food, water, shelter….and a place to poop. That last is all too often left off the list of basic human needs. Pooping is very important to all of us. If you aren’t sure of this fact, just browse around in this blogging community. Julie’s pen, my tree house, Chris and Lisa’s unfortunate neighbors on the east bench, and Wendysue’s Whitney all testify to it, to name a few. And what really drive this point home are the horrible pictures we’ve seen on the news of our friends in the South. So let’s not take for granted our places to poop. Here’s looking at you, Sewer Guys! May your pipes remain unobstructed and may it always run downhill.

15 comments:

wendysue said...

We had our line back up twice, just a little bit (Thanks to those old neighborhoods and pipes), not like Lisa's neighbors, but when you're talkin' poop and sewage, even a little is too much. When the Roto-rooter guy arrived I said, I bet people are always so happy to see you! Anyone who is willing to drag all their equipment into my basement and clear all the tree roots out of our pipes is a friend of mine.

Sister Pottymouth said...

After 3 days of Porta-Potties at girls' camp, I don't know how anyone in New Orleans can insist on staying there. Yes, "poopin' is cool," but only if you have a place to put it. Or at least a treehouse to sit in. :-) It's no wonder plumbers are paid so much.

Otto said...

I thought your blog was informative too. And I'm sure you'd be interested in how to send a poop care package to blog spammers in respect to mary morgan.

Lorien said...

Indeed, a poop care package is just what mary morgan deserves. Love that website, Otto. However, this is my first blog spam and I feel just a little bit flattered that the spammers have finally found me. It's kinda like when the Jerk finds his name in the white pages. I'm somebody! So I think I won't delete her shintty message just yet...

In our old neighborhood we had an interesting back-up situation if I put rice or lettuce down the disposal. We ended up with salad-soup coming up the shower drain (and who knows what else!). Hundred year old sewar pipes are definitely not a good thing.

Otto said...

I wouldn't delete the message either, it helps to increase your number of comments. And I simply MUST have your recipe for shower salad-soup. It sounds delightful!

Lorien said...

Yes, thanks again mary morgan.


Shower Salad-Soup

5 plates leftover rice with peas and corn mixed in
4 cups potato peels, aged overnight
1 lettuce head stump
1 green scouring pad
3 chunks pre-chewed and rejected chicken
2 bowls limp salad--uneaten

Stuff all ingredients into garbage disposal at once. Run disposal and water (full stream) simultaneously, continuously feeding any remaining ingredients into disposal. Continue process until water and ingredients begin to fill up sink. Shut off water and disposal. Check shower. If no salad-soup has appeared yet, turn on shower and wait for water to fill bottom of shower. Salad-soup should appear within a few minutes. If this doesn't work, invite house guest to stay for a week. Salad-soup should appear upon her first shower. Enjoy!

Otto said...

yummy!!!

wendysue said...

Lorien, I have an optional add in to your fabulous recipe. Don't forget a few paper towels down the disposal as well, that worked for us.

Sister Pottymouth said...

Better Shower-Salad Soup than bits of shit coming up the drain. Of course, that could add an interesting flavor to the soup...blechhhh! And the paper towels would certainly increase the fiber content.

Wendy Sue--I've tried to post comments on your page but can't get it to work. Any tips? You've got a great blog.

Sorry, Lorien, for using your comment page to leave comments for someone else's blog. It was a last resort. Besides--you like me too much to ever get really pissed off at me, right? ;-)

Lorien said...

julie, you and your bits are always welcome. I figure the comment section is a conversation place anyway. Why should all parts of the conversation be addressed to me? (Other than the fact that the entire world revolves around me, but that's another issue altogether.)

I was thinking the same about the fiber content of the paper towels. Nice addition to the recipe. Thanks, Wendysue!

wendysue said...

Julie, I've tried to get help from blogger about the comment issue--I have no idea why it does that. . . .
for now, you can right click on the 'comment' part then click on open in a new window! Hey, I'm all for more comments!!

I'm so happy to hear everyone agrees on the paper towels addition (too bad it took us 3 days of not using the kitchen sink, and snaking down all the pipes to figure out that's what was plugging it up!!!)

Lessel Peeper said...

Let me set the stage for this story. A few years ago, my wife's sister, husband, and day-old baby moved in with us for about a year. We had just finished dumping about 20k into the basement and everything was brand new.

A day after giving birth, my sister-in-law passed the world's largest poop in our new bathroom. All I can say at this point is "if it's larger than a loaf of bread, pleas try to break it up before you flush." Words to live by.

The toilet was plugged for at least 2-3 days. However, rather than address the problem, our squatters decided to just continue going on top of the original mess, hoping that it would just magically disappear.

By the time I found out about the problem, there was about a half an inch of standing sewage all over the new bathroom floor. It took me about half an hour with a plunger to get things moving again, but at last we had a flushing toilet.

As I turned to leave the bathroom, my face, arms, and clothes covered in sewage, my squatters appeared at the door, mortified. At last, they realized what they'd done--"Here, clean this shit up!" I barked, handing them the plunger.

I then went upstairs, past the field of wreckage and debris that only weeks before was our new basement and burned my clothes.

I was the sewer man that day, and I learned a valuable lesson...shit rolls down hill, but only after hit bounces off your face.

Sister Pottymouth said...

Good thing you post as Lessel Peeper, right? Wouldn't want Rat & Chucky to discover such a lovely story about themselves circulating on the internet. Oh--and are you a wannabe redneck? You wrote "shit rolls down hill, but only after hit bounces off your face." Hit?

Thanks for sharing your underworld encounter.

Lessel Peeper said...

Doh. Sorry, fat fingers.

They will forever live in infamy.

Sister Pottymouth said...

Infamy or infancy? (Babies have such cute chubby fingers you know...) It's good that you're my brother and can handle such teasing, Lessel Peeper. Love ya!