It’s potty-learning time at our house. I try to let my kids take the reigns and do this at his/her own speed. My youngest has finally decided he likes the feel of “big-boy pannies” better than a diaper. (Yes, at our house they are “pannies” regardless of gender. And no ‘T’ is pronounced. Deal with it.) Those of you with children know, and those of you without can imagine or perhaps remember, that this journey to potty proficiency is fraught with accidents and setbacks. My son and I experienced his first big setback today. I’m pretty good about staying calm and I certainly don’t punish my child. I just put the kid in the tub and clean up the mess. Sometimes an audible growl and “eeeew, yuck!” do escape my lips, but that’s about it.
The worst part of the whole thing is rinsing the poop out of the pannies in the toilet. Ugh. It’s horrid. You start off so gingerly with thumb and forefinger carefully swishing the soiled underwear around in the bowl, trying not to splash. And you can get really quite good at it with the Flush-and-Swish technique. But in the back of your mind you know that ultimately you have to take the dive. There’s no getting around the final pannie wring. I know of no technique to avoid getting poo water on your hands. I hate it.
How did our ancestors do it? I remember the cloth diapers my mother left sitting in the toilet. At times washing those things out must have been more than she could bear. And she had an automatic washer and dryer. What about another 50 or 100 years before her? What if I’d lived then? How would I have managed? First of all, I don’t think I’d have been such a patient potty coach! And I think instead of a diaper pail I would have had a diaper vat—a diapers-only kettle sitting there to toss the diapers into, then fill with water and boil for a very, VERY long time. And what did they use for plastic pants? Wool I guess? How did they ever manage to keep a baby dry and not leaky all the time? Those folks were either incredibly creative and industrious or horribly smelly. Probably both.
What do I learn from all of this? To be grateful. So thank you, inventors of the disposable diaper, the automatic washer and dryer, Clorox wipes and bleach. Thank you.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
32 comments:
My Mother in Law moved w/ her two little kids to Holland about 30 years ago. They didn't have disposable diapers there yet. She had three more kids while she lived there. She came home every summer and bought crates and crates of disposable diapers and had them SHIPPED over to Europe.
I would have too. Amen to you thoughts on pioneer diapers. Women never had it so good. Electric stoves, washers........
But yes, there is a way to keep poo water off of delicate hands...buy a big box of those disposable latex gloves (you have a dentist in the family, just "borrow" some from him). They're cheap, hygienic, and in a pinch they make great balloons for entertaining small, potty-training children. (This coming from the mom who keeps a box of them on hand for all types of cleaning, but never remembers to wear them--maybe because I rarely remember to clean.)
"Potty proficiency"...a beautiful use of alliteration, Lo. I'll have to remember that one. I bet the inventor of those Clorox wipes is making a bundle. It took them long enough, though, to finally come up with them. Dalene, I love the idea of the latex gloves. I keep a box in my kitchen for handling raw meat, but I've never thought about the whole poopy "panny" washout thing. Good thinking!
No kids yet, but I can hardly contain my excitement to rinse poopy undies. I think I'll have to keep a few of those plastic grabbers next to the toilet--the cool flamingo kind you get at the dollar store.
My sister-in-law just throws them in the trash and makes her kids wear diapers as punishment. How much can a new package of tighty-whities be?
If you think getting poo water on your HANDS is gross, you'll have to see my entry on "A Tribute to Sewer Guys" ....
If the mess is bad enough, I've been known to throw pannies away myself. Our pioneer grandmothers would understand. I'd like to think they'd encourage us.
Here's my best potty-training advice I just can't keep to myself: Put yer guy on the toliet backwards and tape up some paper and give him a marker and let him color while he sits there waiting for inspiration. I know this is your fourth, but good advice is good advice, if I do say so myself!
wonderful advice, all of you. I'll see if I can incorporate all of this into my situation. If any of you have any more ideas, please, keep it coming!
Lo, just go Shanghai some of Dad's latex gloves. I think that squeezing poopy britches is much more worthy of a cause than keeping bacteria from metastatizing through a rod in his finger that has been there for over a decade and a half. Besides, if something does happen, he has a few tons of epsom salt in the kitchen to cure any problem that he is extremely unlikely to come across. He'll never miss them. Plus I can show Calvin how to stick them over his head and blow them up to look like a chicken. With the size of that kids' melon, he doesn't have long before they won't fit any more.
Yup, you have too many reasons not to get gloves.
-D-
Lorien, I want you to know I had a clever response to your brother's brilliant and ORIGINAL idea about using Latex gloves. Then I remembered that he's your brother, not my brother, so I am behaving myself. Aren't I good?
Lo, nice to find you.
As a dad with two girls I say just grab the pannies and wring--then wash and wash again. As for what our ancestors did, I read that in the 19th century many people used a soapstick to force toilet training. Just hold 'em over the potty, insert said implement, and voila. A few times of that and the bowels know exactly what the potty means.
On the other hand, you could always travel back in time (or to a third world country) and you'll see what most people without diapers do: they let their kids run around naked below the waist until they are panny-safe. Let me know if that one works out....
Hmm, running around naked, sounds like fun idea in theory, but I think I'd rather have the mess in the pannies, then on the $12,000 Persian rug, you know what I'm talking about!? I mean seriously. I think the latex gloves are a good idea, Lorien, but seeing as it's just recently been suggested to you, you'll excuse me if the next time I see you, I don't shake your hand.
Oh, Otto, you and your funny little rugs.
More advice! Thanks one and all...
D-big melon? Like you're one to talk. Ha! Take that!
compulsive, do your worst. He's my lil bro, he'd better be able to take it by now. And he's pretty good at doling it out, himself, you know. (stay tuned, I'm sure...)
brian, thanks for swingin by! That soapstick method sounds just disturbing. The naked thing is fine, except that sometimes little boys enjoy it too much.
Lorien, I also thought your blog was cool. I'm quick to throw out the pannies. By the way, did you ever get that code I left for you on another blog?
Hey, wow! Is johnfisher hitting on me? In my teens and early twenties, I was totally offended if anyone hit on me. No more righteous indignation for me, no sir!
Jenny, turns out I suck at codes. I missed Chris', and now yours. I'm just WAY not subtle.
Mine is still on there.
Dear compulsive writer:
I am sure you are the first person in creation to think of using rubber gloves to rinse out a poopy diaper. Pity you didn't take out a patent on your ORIGINAL idea, you'd be rich. My most humble and sincere apologies for encroaching on your ORIGINAL idea.
P.S., lay your response on me. Restraint isn't something we value highly in our family.
Lo,
I'm not criticizing big melons. I'm a fan. Big foreheads are a plus too. I'm just concerned that if he doesn't learn soon, he might not have the chance to try. I tried not too long ago and the glove snapped before I could get it over my nose. It's like getting snapped really hard with a rubber band, except you feel it all around your head and face at once. Not fun, unless of course, you're watching the one who gets snapped.
Sheesh, try to show concern for family and look at what I get...
Hugs and kisses.
-D-
see compulsive? I told you. But I think he typed all of that with a smile on his face.
Llama, guy says he likes big melons, too. And regarding the glove, point well taken. It's important my son acquire these critical skills early in life. That way he can impress all the girls. I haven't ever snapped my entire face at once with a rubber band, but not too long ago I separated two tiny elastics by biting one and pulling on the other. It's amazing how tender that upper lip is! The great thing is that I've done it more than once. Duh.
And Jenny, I've looked and looked to no avail. I told you I wasn't subtle.
Oh brother. That was me. I was logged in as Guy AGAIN.
Lorien: in terms of potty training, have you ever considered shaming and spanking? IT WORKS!!!!
Dear Guy/Lorien,
Isn't that the beautiful of mawwagggge? You eventually become interchangeable?
Dear D,
I don't claim to be the first person to have thought of using latex goves for playing in poo water. I am, however, interested enough in what other people have to say that I actually read other people's comments before I throw in my two cents. (Hence, had I been you, I would've already known that not only did someone already suggest latex gloves and where to find some, said person also mentioned how great they were when blown up for entertainment. I will admit, however, that I was thinking more in the line of cow udders than chicken heads...so kudos to you.)
How's that for unrestrained? That's about how straight I'd have shot if you were my baby bro. Still friends?
Dear Guy/Lorien,
I typed that with a smile on my face, too. And he did ask for my best shot. Still friends?
p.s. Thanks for the celestial laundry session today. I'm going to start all my household projects (with or without latex gloves) with the joyful song "I Have Work Enough to Do..." and a prayer.
C.W.,
Perhaps you didn't read my comment quite as closely as you thought before tossing in your two cents. Had you done so, you may have realized that my post had much less to do with proposing the idea of using gloves to avoid getting poo under your nails than it did to make a bunch of inside jokes to Lo about our padre. I don't expect you would get the jokes, but I don't think it's too difficult to spot that that's what I was doing.
P.S., you can probably dig in a lot more than that. I am in New York, and in grad school. If it's not my professors informing me how stupid I am, It's a drunk bum calling me fun names for not spotting him 10 bucks to catch a bus back home. Enduring goading from people in Utah is a cake walk.
Lo,
I knew when I put that post on this morning that I was just going to give you the chance to say "I told you so...," and in light of that, I almost didn't post. You're welcome.
Alright, it's past my bedtime. And yes, I had a mischeveeyous (I'm tired and the blog doesn't have spellcheck, so you'll have to deal with my misspelling. Hukt on fonicks wurkd four mee.) grin on my face as I posted. Just so we know we're all still friends
Hugs and kisses.
Dally Llama, you are definitely related to Lorien. You two have a very similar sense of humor. I love reading your sibling banter. Too funny! Good luck with the bums in NY.
I raised him from a pup! I did okay, didn't I? My buttons were just about to bust as he threw out those insults and jabs. Sniff. He's one of the best. Miss the little guy all in law school and stuff.
Dear D,
I can't compete with drunk bums in NY (my vocab is a little more refined) or young, bright law students (excuse the pun, but I can't help myself) in NY either. I concede.
Best wishes,
C.W.
Dear Lorien,
You should be proud, very proud. My baby bro is currently jobless, homeless and hopeless (according to him). I keep hoping he's only kidding about the hopeless part.
I'm feelin the love here.
There's something to be said about a refined vocabulary. I attended a social function last night that included more than a little alcohol. Let's just say that several conversations started with substantially unrefined vocabulary words, and ended with some guy I've never met before telling me how much he respects everything I'm doing here. I considered myself on notice that at any moment me might have pledged his undying love for me, or something. The funny thing is that I went to this function right after institute. Just a little bit of contrast. So don't feel down on yourself if you can't compete with drunk New Yorkers. Not many people can.
Good thing Ann isn't hearing these stories, D. "Kid, I'm tellin ya, ya won't find you a honey fishing in that kind of a pond." Or "Now, you know you need to avoid the appearance of evil. Surely you were raised to know better than to go to those kinds of parties."
I was raised to know better than to go to those types of parties...And don't call me Shirley.
Hmm...That joke isn't quite as funny in writing.
Odd that you chose a fishing analogy to put in Ann's mouth because a few years ago as I was showing you or Guy, or someone my fishing pictures, she castigated me for wasting all my time fishing when I should be out trying to find a wife. "I don't understand why in the world you would be out in the freezing cold playing with fish when you should be trying to get married. Honestly Dallas, you can't marry a fish. That going fishing all the time and letting the fish go is just stupid..."
I miss her. Tell her I said hi next time you see her. I can only imagine what she would think of the scene at the law school...
Lorien, the Today Show this morning had a segment on potty training before the first birthday in a sort of Lamaze for Tots. The process is called "Elimination Communication"--and with a catchy name like that it must work! They have group meetings (aka. potty fests) around the country taught by potty mentors (aka. Bowel Whisperers): check out www.diaperfreebaby.org for a listing.
I'm with the others. I ALWAYS throw away poopy underwear. Best $1 you'll ever spend.
pampers
I have a friend who always refered to baby rubber pants for cloth diapers as, "rubber pannies". At the time, we both had children in diapers, and both of us used old-fashioned cloth diapers with diaper pins and rubber pants. You brought a big smile to my face with your blog. Thank you!
Post a Comment